2018

To a year that started off with a high fever, and wrapped up with the worst week of my entire life...

I never thought I'd say this... 

But I'm thankful for you.

You've tested my faith more than ever before.

You took away one of my favorite people in the world. 

You put me through heartache.

You put me through pain.

You brought forth changes, and struggles, and goodbyes...

But through it all, I'm thankful; because you were used to answer my prayers.

I'd been praying all year for my mindset to shift. 

I wanted to desire God above everything else. 

I wanted to remember who I am. 

I wanted to learn to cherish every moment in life, and grow more into a woman of Christ.

God used all you've thrown at me to answer every single one of those prayers.

How could I be bitter? 

How could I be "downcast"?

You proved to me my God is real. 

You've shown me sides of Him that I never would've otherwise seen. 

You've given me a new perspective on life, on family, on friends, on love, and on faith. 

You've allowed me to experience His grace firsthand, and to see the evidence of His love all around. 

Through my darkest moments, you gave me people who helped me see glimpses of light. 

Those same people helped me to harbor my joy once again. 

You taught me to look beyond the bad; because so many things happen in life that it'd be a waste to let a few rotten moments cloud my scenic view. 

You may have brought me pain, but you know? You mostly brought me good.

You showed me who my real friends are.

You brought me my driver's license, my "dream age", and the world of upperclassmen.

You gave me my first lead.

You allowed me to meet my "big sister" who's 230 miles away.

You showed me more of my worth than I've ever seen in my life.

You gave me a church home for the first time that I can remember.

You taught me to live in every moment.

I could go on, but my point is: 

I'm thankful.

Thank you for every goodbye. 

Thank you for every storm. 

Thank you for every day I thought I couldn't take it anymore.

You were an answer to my prayers.

I now enter 2019 a woman of strength.

I believe now, with everything in me, that God is enough for me.

I don't know what comes next, but I have the feeling it's something big. 

So to 2019, I'm ready. 

Whatever may come...

Let it begin.